Archive for the ‘Prayer, desire, and begging’ Category


June 18th, 2014



Was I truly in heaven?

Walking upon the clouds

Weightless, everything spinning around me

Yet, in perfect balance with the above and below

Firm, intentional footsteps

Sinking deep into the folds of fabric

Then floating back up into the landscape

Of soft peaks and valleys


Tiptoeing ever so quietly

Through the down comforter

Piled high as a mountain

On the floor at the foot of the bed


As I left the room, him, asleep

Entering back into my sad reality


Men, Poems, Prayer, desire, and begging

WISH GRANTED (From Modern Prayers for Modern People)

April 5th, 2014
My heart remains in Hawaii

My heart remains in Hawaii

I carried my wish granting crystal in the coin pocket of my skinny jeans for four days. On Thursday I wished for a man. I begged for a man. I demanded a man. I even wined a bit hoping the universe would shower some kindness and compassion upon my blackened soul.

Dear Powers That Be,

Bless you for granting my wish.

Thank you for taking me out of my hell of incessant suffering and

removing me from the solitary confinement which sooths my soul.

Allowing me the pleasure of pressing my skin against another’s skin.

Breathing his breath as though it were my own.

Feeling his heart beat inside of my heart.

Experiencing pure ecstasy of looking into his eyes, looking into mine.

Merged with the infinite, for that moment, I no longer felt dead.

Men, Prayer, desire, and begging , , ,

Please stop F-ing With Me! (from Fucked up Prayers for Fucked up people or Modern Prayers for Modern people)

January 21st, 2014

Dear Me__, (Fill in the bank with your favorite Supreme Being, Deity, Spirit Guide, etc)

It’s me!
Please cease and desist these childish games of “groundhog day”, “around the block one more time”, and “remember me?”

When I meet a man in my life and it doesn’t go in a very positive way, I say goodbye and move on.

Why do you keep sending them back to me?
Nora always use to say, “bless them and send them back to God.”
Did God move and not send me its forwarding address?
Is it because I don’t believe in God and am merely “talking to the hand?”
Or just nature’s way of telling me something’s wrong?
Jesus! Or Holy cow! Or just plain, Fuck me!

Hello? Yes, this is she.
Or in Text form: Yes? Who is this, you are not in my “contacts”

Oh, hey Ramano, yes, it’s been a long time. Yes, the Chef, of course I remember you. What’s up? Want to get together? Sure. I still haven’t heard from him yet.

Oh Vik! Yes, I remember you from my friends, friend’s, birthday party 18 months ago. (The worst date that I have ever been on) No, I don’t want to get together again!

Hey Dave! Do I remember you? Not exactly. You were the one that drugged and maybe raped me on New Years Eve last year. So, no, no, I don’t want to go out for a drink.

Steve, Steve who? Oh yes, the Steve from that outside hotel bar two years ago. The after party, party. Are you still married? Yeah, thought so. Call me after the divorce comes through. Nope, I haven’t been thinking about you at all.

Oh hey Paul! What’s up? Do you think we will ever get back together again? WTF! We broke up in 1982. No, no, no, it’s not going to happen. Click.

Fuh real?

It’s been a rough year.
Maybe only two dates, two booty calls.

With gratitude, I would like to say that at least men find me memorable and desirable enough to contact me years after we met, regardless of the outcome.
So what if I am still single.
There are worse things in the world.

Men, Prayer, desire, and begging , ,

PEACE PROPOSAL TO MYSELF (Declaration and vow of daily happiness)

June 15th, 2013

(From: “F-ed up prayers for F-ed up people” or “Modern Prayers for Modern people”)

Before the end of 2015 I will be fully immersed in my new career and life path as Holistic Coach.

I will be living in financial, spiritual, and sexual abundance with one or more life partners.

Food will be my friend and create joy in my life.

Like-minded people who contribute and support my growth will surround me.

Pleasure will dominate pain.

Love will pave the way.

Prayer, desire, and begging , , ,


July 3rd, 2012


Dear me, it’s me

Please protect me on Sunday’s.

Allow me to never fall prey to the seductions of intellectual men.

To ignore the pleasures of the senses that lead to unwise choices.

And most of all,

Steer me away from the “walk of shame”, leading me only

To the path of righteous self respect, love, and contentment without


Prayer, desire, and begging , , , , ,


September 28th, 2010

This prayer is to Nanak-the 4th Sikh Guru – June 2009
Nanak is the granter of miracles

Oh Nanak-
Grant me the peace and serenity
To find comfort in the sound of my own footsteps
echoing off the clouds of the night time sky

To hear laughter in the sweet sounds of the singing birds
In the earliest silence of the pastel dawn

To open my heart a bit more and allow
The warmth and generosity of the universe to creep in

To stretch my wings wide enough to protect all those who
suffer and uplift those without hope

Oh Nanak-
Your strength is mine

Prayer, desire, and begging ,


September 26th, 2010

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